One Week…

I think this might be the hardest week I have ever had in my life… And this is not our first adoption, and we have been through some hard weeks. We have had open heart surgery for little M, baby J in casts for 14 weeks, baby J in the hospital with an unknown virus… we’ve done hard, and we can handle hard. But nothing was ever like this week.

You guys, adoption is hard. I know I’ve said it before… Adoption is beautiful, and it is beautifully heartbreaking. Adoption is rooted in loss, and it is raw pain, and feelings, and sadness and profound grief. I love adoption… but it is SO hard.

And this adoption, by far, has been our hardest.

We have struggled so much… but we have felt each and every one of your prayers, and each day we have woken up with a new sense of purpose and inspired love for this little girl.

Today we have had tiny P for one week. She is a tough little thing, and it has been a struggle to watch her be so sad and despondent, and just terrified of pretty much everything.

But we have also been blessed. Each day has gotten a tiny bit better, and each day we have woken up with a renewed sense of hope…

We have hope for our little girl’s future, and we have hope for our little girl’s love, and hope for her health (just look at her sweet little blue, clubbed fingers) and happiness.

Each day she comes out of her shell just a little bit more, and each day there is a little less crying.

And we know that soon, hopefully very soon, we will get to see a beautiful little smile.

9 Comments

  1. Gail Viechnicki on September 23, 2014 at 1:25 pm

    Thinking of you and keeping you in my prayers. Gail

  2. Musings from Kim K. on September 23, 2014 at 1:54 pm

    Continued prayers for your sweet little one.

  3. noname on September 23, 2014 at 2:46 pm

    Praying for your sweet family. 🙂

  4. Elizabeth Dahl on September 23, 2014 at 3:18 pm

    I feel like I have seen that shellshocked expression on so many sweet little faces in China. If only there was a way to communicate to them that it is going to get so much better. Hugs to you, and praying for a continued adjustment.

  5. Unknown on September 23, 2014 at 5:26 pm

    Praying for your sweet baby. So proud of M and J too.

  6. Always wear your tiara on September 23, 2014 at 5:53 pm

    It is so painful to see her like this yet we all know it is part of the process, her process. I find myself wanting to say I am sorry, to you but really We can't be sorry that she is grieving because grieving is good and healthy.Urghh. yes, adoption is hard, so hard, so \”brutifully\” hard. Hugs to all.P.S. those are the cutest little blue hands.

  7. Tonya on September 23, 2014 at 10:19 pm

    Continued prayers to you and your family

  8. Paula on September 24, 2014 at 1:07 am

    So incredibly difficult to witness. Grieving big means she can love big….she will find her way. Hugs and prayers. You are a beautiful family in every sense of the word.

  9. jessica on September 24, 2014 at 3:14 am

    Prayers are coming your way from us!

Leave a Comment